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Thoughts

Talking VS Listening online

When the pandemic started, during the first quarantine, I remember I felt the need to talk. The thought, the possibility of not being able to socialize and discuss for a period of undetermined length, stressed me.

So I turned to the Internet. Tried to participate in discussions on social media or trigger such discussions with my own posts. Most of the times, there were lengthy discussions. Usually two main opposing opinions and the Internet community forming two sides around them.

Lately I try to stay away of discussions on social media. I, instead, reread the aforementioned discussions. Sadly, in all of them, I see myself being there more for the sake of the discussion rather than to share an opinion. Or to prove a point.

I think there’s much more in listening online, rather than talking. I think that listening and self-reflecting can really bring us close to realizing where we stand on specific subjects.

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Thoughts

Coaches, mentors and self-discovery

Coaching, according to Wikipedia, is the practice of guiding an individual through a process. It refers to practical knowledge and that is why it is very important for a coach to be both an experienced professional and a good trainer. Generally speaking I am very careful, suspicious even, around coaches. Most of them have been self declared coaches and have no training and little or no experience.

Mentoring, is having a master of our guilt, leveling up our game by revealing the secrets of the profession we are following. Or we may have a mentor that influences our values, principles and thus our character. A mentor is a person we know and trust. A role model.

Both coaches and mentors can help us pave the path or our lives (personal or professional) via learning / training. But there is also another way. One that requires noone else but ourselves.

This is the road of self discovery. A journey of being aware of the pros and cons of ourselves, our true goals, potentials, strengths, weaknesses, the way we deal with everyday challenges and, eventually, how we live our lives.

The path to self discovery lies in self reflection. At least that is the most effective way I know until today.

SELF-REFLECTION EXERCISE — THE WALK!

– By the end of each week, find a couple of hours and take a walk alone.

– When you start walking have in hand the 4-5 most important incidents of the week. Personal, professional, related to relationships, business choices, how you treated someone or a challenge you faced.

– If you don’t have a good memory take a note to your mobile.

– Whole you walk replay the incident in your head and try to watch it as an objective observer.

– How does yourself look to you in this specific incident. Are you kind, mean, are you abusive, respectful, to you judge or are you a good listener?

– Repeat the exercise every week for at least a month.

– You can optionally record some of your thoughts using the voice assistant of your phone and a notepad application.

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Thoughts

The lost art of smiling

Imagine you are on a crisis. Customers are unhappy, people are yelling, things are not well, time is not enough, money are lost, it is a bad day.

The worst thing one can do is lose it. Stop thinking and start demanding, criticizing, trying to find the fault, blame someone (else) for the situation. I still do it more often than I would like, although I am trying hard not to.

Now imagine, in that moment, while in the eye of the tornado, to see a smile. That genuine smile that comes from a calm face. A face determined to try hard to solve the problem but not in panic.

What’s stopping you from being that smile?

Have you ever worked with a person like that?

Do you use humor during hard times to lighten the mood?

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Thoughts

The view from above

The Stoics have been using the “view from above” exercise to force their mind to observe a situation from such a distance to make it feel insignificant.

The usual metaphor is to imagine ourselves experiencing the planet earth from the eyes of an astronaut. This way “earthly” problems looks pretty small.

Today, there was tons of micromanagement at work. I hate micromanagement. I always hook on a task and can’t get my head out of it, losing a lot of time.

Here’s something you can try. Next time you are hooked on a thought, task, work or problem, you think of the bigger goal you need to accomplish and reverse analyze it to smaller tasks. The more you decompose, the clearer the solution will become. If, during the process you hook on a smaller task, throw away everything and start over.

For managers: combine the above technique with delegation. It’s a winner strategy.

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Thoughts

Philocaly

Philocaly means to love beauty.

I guess we all do love beauty. We do!

Maybe it is difficult to recognize beauty in times of crises. Maybe there is a lack of stimuli when, for example, you are forced to stay home in quarantine.

But beauty is still there, nonetheless. In a nice restaurant when we dine after a long time. In a play or movie we watch with a couple of friends or family. Even wearing masks. Even keeping distances. In returning at work and share a slice of pizza or beer with your colleagues.

Maybe times of crises are a great opportunity to rediscover beauty, hidden in plain sight. A great opportunity to practice philocaly.

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Thoughts

A resilient routine

Back in March 2020, during the first COVID-19 lockdown, I was sitting in my home office pondering on how our daily routine was probably going to change for a long time, if not forever.

After a short break — the summer of 2020 — the second lockdown came even harder on my country (Greece), with a duration of more than 6 months.

Time allocation was almost impossible, personal and professional tasks fused and I was trying to get things done in a storm or constant distractions.

We need to find a way to achieve a resilient routine. This may be the most valuable lesson COVID-19 can teach us.